Domestic Violence Task Force
If You Are a Victim?
Your safety is the most important thing to consider when dealing with an abusive partner. Listed below are some guidelines to consider when making plans to leave the relationship for good.
If you are in an abusive relationship, think about:
For a complete list of these and other safety plan guidelines, please visit www.ncvc.org
- Identify your partner’s use and level of force so that you can assess danger to you and your children before it occurs.
- Identify safe areas of the house where there are no weapons and where there are always ways to escape. If arguments occur, try to move to those areas.
- If violence is unavoidable, make yourself a small target: dive into a corner and curl up into a ball with your face protected and your arms around either side of your head, fingers entwined.
- If possible, have a phone accessible at all times and know the numbers to call for help.
- Don’t be afraid to call the police.
- Let trusted friends and neighbors know of your situation and develop a plan and visual signal for when you need help.
- Teach your children how to get help. Instruct them not to get involved in the violence between you and your partner. Plan a code word to signal them that they should get help or leave the house.
- Practice (with your children) how to get out safely.
- Plan for what you will do if your children tell your partner of your plan or if your partner otherwise finds out about your plan.
- Make a habit of backing the car into the driveway and keeping it fueled. Keep the driver’s door unlocked and the other doors locked for a quick escape.
- Try not to wear scarves or long jewelry that could be used to strangle you.
- Create several plausible reasons for leaving the house at different times of the day or night.
- Take with you important phone numbers of friends, relatives, doctors, schools, etc., as well as other important items, including:
- Driver’s license
- Birth Certificates (yours and your children’s)
- School & Medical Records
- Regularly needed medication
- List of credit cards held by self or jointly, or the credit cards themselves if you have access to them
- Pay stubs
- Checkbooks and information about bank accounts and other assets
Last updated: Monday June 18 2012